Wednesday, April 28

The new Iraqi flag is a lovely confection sired by the same Madison Avenue folks who sold you Coke, Pepsi, and Corn Flakes. As packaged goods go, the Disney colours of Iraq are as cute as Pluto and Goofy together on a fishin' trip.

And, in Fallujah, this calls for a Bud Light!

Perhaps the Bush Iraq flag should, instead, hearken back to his own parched Texas youth and include some symbols from there. How about a coke mirror and a bottle of Wild Turkey? Maybe something else--like an image of a squinting old cock from the backwater with a Bible in one hand and a porch Shotgun in the other? Or, let's get real, and give up, and use the golden-fucking-arches for Christ's sake ... literally.

No suprise that many Iraqis haven't taken yet to the new imposed--and dullishly imposing--flag and colours. In Baghdad, you could see the huddled masses peering up at the flag pole and whispering with incredulity behind cupped hands at this latest insult.

Ah, the spoils of war. Now featuring focus groups. And graphic designers.

Really, all they needed to fly was the Stars and Stripes (or the Stars and Starbucks). You see, the Iraqis may be occupied, beaten, and humiliated, but they ain't fooled.

Or, as Aretha Franklin once sang, "Who's Zoomin' Who?"